A Dove, A Verse, A Window of the Soul

by jillnovak on May 4, 2013

“We long for the companionship of God.
We long for the assurance that we are not taking the journey alone.
That He is walking with us and talking with us and He is intimately involved in our lives.”
~ Ken Gire, Windows of the Soul

The other morning when I went into Grandpa’s room to check on him, I noticed his flip calendar. It wasn’t normal how I saw it, though. His daily devotional calendar sits on a roll top desk in the corner of his room partially hidden behind the door, so it’s not a place I usually look when I enter the room.

The funny thing is, our pet dove was perched atop my head as he often does while I work around the house (I told you it was funny), so when I walked down the hall to Grandpa’s room, the bird went along for the ride.

As I was checking a sore on Grandpa’s toe, the dove flew off my head and around the room and then he landed on Grandpa’s daily devotional calendar. I wouldn’t have noticed it otherwise. But as I was leaving the room, I picked up the calendar with the bird still perched upon it, so I could carry him back to the kitchen. That’s when my eyes fell on this verse:

“And if thy brother be waxed poor, and fallen in decay with thee, then thou shalt revive him: yea, though he be a stranger, or a sojourner shall he live with thee.” Leviticus 25:35~ASV

This verse of scripture immediately consoled my heart and through it the Lord touched me deeply right where I was, showing me that he knows the anguish of my heart. He knows how I carry the health and well-being of my father so close to my heart, it hurts.

Lately, it seems that we are dealing with an unending string of medical conditions, and the added insult of a nasty cold.

Something has changed.

In order for Grandpa to finish breakfast in a reasonable amount of time – one hour verses three – I now have to feed him his cereal and egg.

Add this to the long list of  conditions we have had to deal with in the last three years:

Parkinson’s disease
chronic incontinence
impacted bowels (twice, right around Thanksgiving)
persistent pressure ulcers
arthritis
dysphagia (difficulty swallowing)
cataracts
bacterial eye infections
chronic drainage problems
Osteomyelitis (a possible bone infection of the toe)
the daily need to be reminded to drink
colds

Yes, this isn’t going to get any easier.

But now I am reminded, we don’t carry the burden alone.  It is first and foremost the Lord’s.

I mean, what are the odds of a dove landing on a devotional calendar on just that particular verse of scripture?

It was then that the Lord spoke to my heart and said: You’re right where I have placed you, Jill, in the midst of one crazy medical condition after another. I am here with you, caring for your father. I am his Father. You are my daughter. I will care for him through you. Your life is not defined by caregiving, but defined by me the ultimate caregiver who lives in your heart.

The Lord lovingly showed me that He will continue to walk with us through every change that is to come.

I am once again humbled by His grace and mercy and His timing…

I needed a special touch just now and He knew it – a Window of the Soul.

 

 

 



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Grandpa and Mother Theresa

by jillnovak on January 11, 2013

Suddenly Grandpa yells from his room, “Jill, Bob, come here! It’s really important!”

“I don’t want to exercise tonight! Can I take the night off? I can’t write! I can’t think!”

“Just when you think it’s safe to go back in the water,” Robert says (insert Jaws theme music here).

“No!” says Robert in his typical no-mincing words rhetoric (the art of discourse to inform, persuade, or motivate particular audiences in specific situations).

Robert’s response is totally ignored by Grandpa.

Eric steps in to help because he’s getting ready for work in the washroom next to Grandpa’s room. He tries to sooth the savage beast and his fears before heading off to work.

“Don’t you think it’s kind of funny that you’re having this problem Grandpa when you are writing a new book about our struggles with the enemy?” he says.

Grandpa half listens, but he ain’t buying it.

Eric offers to pray with him.

Eric’s prayer falls on deaf ears.

After Eric leaves for work, Grandpa comes wheeling down the hall and plants himself firmly in the middle of the living room opposite my computer area and stares out the window.

He sits…and sits…and I try to ignore him as I work on designing a brochure for my friend Linda for her beauty salon.

I glance over my shoulder.

Out of the corner of my eye I see that Grandpa has turned around. I feel his beady little eyes staring me in the back.

I quickly turn around and ignore him… I ignore him some more… and some more.

What seems like and eternity passes and I begin to feel guilty.

Then the Lord says to me in a pretty loud voice, “That’s not compassion, Jill.”

Ugh! Ugh! Double ugh!!

I pray a quick prayer, “God give me the strength of Mother Theresa!” I don’t want to yell, I don’t want to react, I just want to handle this interruption with mercy and grace.

One daughter says, “Who’s Mother Theresa, some random nun?”

The other says matter-of-factly, “A gap in her education.”

I laugh.

I turn around and wheel my chair over to Grandpa. I listen as he expresses his fear of falling when he get’s off the exercise equipment. He’s usually pretty shaky, but Bob always holds onto him. He isn’t going anywhere with Bob there.

I try to comfort Grandpa and explain that he is really benefiting from his exercise. His legs are a lot stronger and he doesn’t huff or puff when he walks down the hallway. Still, I tell him, “Maybe you can take a break tonight, but you’ll have to exercise on Sunday to make up for it.”

“How many 92 year olds have to exercise?” he complains.

I hear Robert yell down the hallway, “Dead 92 year olds don’t have to exercise! By-the-way, he adds, he’s still exercising!”

Well, that’s the end of that. Grandpa and I are overruled by the head of the household.

I comfort him and say, “Grandpa, the benefit of exercise far outweighs the momentary discomfort.” Hey, isn’t that found on the Bible somewhere? I say to myself.

Yes, 2 Corinthians 4:17 says, “For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all.”

Keep fighting the good fight, Grandpa. You won’t have to exercise in heaven. You can sit on a cloud and sip tea with Mother Theresa!

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In the Meantime, In-Between Time, Ain’t We Got Fun!

January 4, 2013

Taking care of Grandpa is just about the hardest thing our family has ever had to do. It has s-t-r-e-t-c-h-e-d my husband (in compassionate ways). It has s-t-r-e-t-c-h-e-d my kids (in unselfish ways). And it has s-t-r-e-t-c-h-e-d me (in patient ways) because I have to keep peace between all the adjoining nations (various family members [...]

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The Granddaddy of All Fights

December 18, 2012

Grandpa’s gearing up for the “grandaddy of all fights.” A gust of wind took down a big branch from the tree across the driveway outside his bedroom window. He’s been obsessing about it because he can see it straddling the wooden picket fence like a teeter totter. Robert told him not to worry about it, [...]

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The Lord Told Me…

December 2, 2012

So I’m helping Grandpa on with his sweater this morning when he says, “The Lord told me it was Monday.” Jill: “No Dad, it’s Sunday.” Grandpa: “Well, the Lord told me it was Monday.” Eric interjected jokingly from the hallway: “Well, it could be Satan, Grandpa.” Grandpa didn’t hear him… I thought to myself, next [...]

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Twitter, Really Now

September 8, 2012

So Grandpa asks me at dinner, “What is Twitter?” I was really taken aback. “Where did you hear about that?” I asked. “Oh, I don’t know,” he replied looking at me mater-of-factly (like, what do you think I am, dear daughter, socially and technologically inept? I may be 91, but I am aware of a [...]

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Program Wars – Been There, Done That!

September 2, 2012

Grandpa has been on my nerves lately. He finally finished writing his book, Yeti: The Adventures of The Abominable Snowman and sent it off to a publisher for what he hopes will be a lucrative book contract. He wrote for something like 175 days days straight, with a few breaks here and there. However, near [...]

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The Answer to Grandpa’s Prayers

September 2, 2012

“I love my bedroom,” Grandpa said. While he was in the nursing home, he prayed that he would have a room someday all by himself where he could write. And he asked for a room with a view, too. His bedroom has windows on three sides facing north, south, and east. So, technically this move [...]

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August 29, 2012

Grandpa’s singing at the top of his lungs right over Claire’s bedroom where she is sleeping in late. Yesterday, Robert set his clock ahead because he has been dilly dallying at bedtime instead of brushing his teeth. So this morning when it was really 9:00 (the usual time he gets up, he thought is was [...]

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Grandpa and the GOP

August 29, 2012

Watching the Republican Convention with Grandpa. A country western singer comes on and Grandpa asks me if I remember Mario Lanza (not sure if I follow that train of thought, Grandpa). Now John McCain is on, and Grandpa says, “He’s banging Obama!” LOL

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